dear chicago city clerk and everyone else in the known universe:

WHY DOES EVERYBODY ALWAYS SPELL MY NAME WRONG QUIT IT QUIT IT QUIT IT QUIT IT QUIT IT!!!!

IT’S NOT ‘DOWNWARD’!!!!! JESUS CHRIST!!!!! I EVEN SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU PEOPLE OVER THE PHONE!!! D O W N A R D!!!!!!! NO SECOND W!!!!!!!! QUIT PUTTING IT IN THERE!!!!!!!!

QUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

I HATE YOU ALL WITH ALL THE HATE IN THE WORLD THAT COULD POSSIBLY DRIVE ME TO USE ALL CAPS AND MULTIPLE EXCLAMATION POINTS.

:(,
–sabrina