* tang digs around on the intarweb
<tang> http://catsays.blogspot.com/2005_01_01_catsays_archive.html#110685356311820985
<tang> 250 tons — *empty*
<tang> here are the tires for the fucker, standing next to people: http://www.michelin.com.sg/michelinasia/mig_org_news_aug02.jsp
<tang> I hope there’s 797B pr0n in my calendar some month
<tang> ooh, another one: http://www.pneu-schroeder.ch/info.htm
* niqui appreciates products that help lower her cost-per-ton!
<tang> I like the photo of 12 people standing in an aircraft hangar in front of the tire, which is twice at tall as any of them and wider than all of them
* niqui giggles.
<tang> It says “Bridgestone” in letters as tall as your head
* tang swoons
* twork wants a 797b
* twork also wants a year’s worth of fuel budget for 24×7 operation of a 797b
* tang would accept that in lieu of the 797B
<twork> if you got both, you could commute with the 797b and still have change left over for, say, a new house.
<twork> or a parking place for the 797b.
<tang> verily!

* twork dreams of SMASH!ing puny suv’s with twork’s battle-hardened 797b
* niqui moans. my kingdom for a jacuzzi. or possibly just some more advil.
* twork ‘s kingdom for a 797b. it’s a better deal. you could sell the 797b at a loss and still afford a mighty fine jacuzzi.
<twork> and buy back twork’s kingdom.
* niqui weeps for her lack of a jacuzzi.
* niqui is a one-track niqui today.
<twork> 797b what?
<niqui> jacuzzi!
<twork> bubbly.
<niqui> waaaaaarm.
<twork> not especially big-truck-like, though. you have to admit that.
<niqui> more fizzy, less diesely.
<tang> not as hot either
<twork> yes. and unless dropped from a great height, not all that SMASH!y.
<niqui> but much more comfy to kick back and watch a movie in, though.
<tang> unless it’s a drive-in
<twork> depends upon one’s aftermarket modifications!
<twork> there’s plenty of room in that truck bed for a very nice den.
<niqui> its top speed is like 45 mph in seventh gear. the jacuzzi totally has more fizz.
<tang> don’t let the CAT hear you say that
<niqui> you can invite more friends to hang out in your jacuzzi than in your 797b.
* tang steps away from niqui
<twork> better be one damn big jacuzzi.
<niqui> what? hot tubs! they’re for sitting around and gossipping in!
<twork> and dirnking. forget ye not the dirnking.
<niqui> also for watching movies and for making your back pain go away.
<niqui> yes! dirnking!
<tang> you can build a jacuzzi in the back of the 797B for yourself, your family, and every friend you’ve ever met
<niqui> but if i buy a jacuzzi i don’t have to build one, and the sooner i get to relax with fizzy bubbles.
<twork> and haul it around at 45mph SMASH!ing suv’s!
<niqui> okay, there’s something to be said for smashing suvs from your hot tub, you’ve got me there.
<tang> then mount a flat-panel display on the back of the cab, and watch movies in full scale with THX audio and cushy seats
<tang> IN THE JACUZZI
<tang> plus: jacuzzi = cooling system for running the engine even faster
<niqui> okay, perhaps we can meet each other halfway and compromise on the 797b-jacuzzimobile.
<tang> +1

tang: “i don’t think i’ve ever imagined a more fabulous vehicle.”