you know your weekend is not going to shape up to be what you might have hoped for when you get up in the morning, go to brush your teeth and wash your face, and the bathroom sink hot water tap sputters and spits and eventually runs out of water. to be followed in short order by the kitchen hot water tap, the kitchen cold water tap, the bathtub cold water tap, and eventually the bathroom sink cold water tap.

scant minutes after i left a mildly confused-sounding message for my building manager (“Hi, um… I dunno if the water department was working on anything again… but I don’t have any water… like, at all…”) my doorbell rang and it was he; apparently the main pipe for the building asploded. So now I have no water. No water means no coffee. All the water I have is what’s in my teakettle (which I think is empty, actually), and what’s in the toilet tank.

I think I’m going to have to go make an emergency bottled-water run to Jewel. No shower is bad enough, but — No coffee, man! What is this, a third-world country?!?!