brandon mccarthy traded to the texas rangers for three prospects.

oh, you’d better believe there’s more behind the jump.

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kenny, i was admittedly taken aback that you chose to trade freddy and not javy. then i was a little bit surprised that you kept pods. but now you trade brandon away? after telling everyone he was totally getting a spot as a starter after being completely wasted in the wretched bullpen all last season (while our starters all (except for Jon, credit where credit is due) apparently ALL SIMULTANEOUSLY FORGOT HOW TO PITCH)? after saying you freaking traded freddy so there was a spot for brandon?? WHAT ARE YOU SMOKING, BECAUSE YOU NEED TO STOP IT RIGHT NOW.

seriously, you have oh my god no idea how upset and disappointed i am. i love my funny-lookin’ eighty-seven foot tall newbie pitcher! you know, the one WHO HELPED US WIN OUR FIRST WORLD SERIES IN YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS. (after you guys in management screwed around and let us almost totally blow our lead over cleveland in the last fifteen games of the season before you could be arsed to call him up from charlotte, thank you very much.)

YOU. ARE. SO. ON. MY. SHIT. LIST.

you just go ask neal cotts or cliffe politte (who you bloody well hung on to way past his sell-by date, might i add; another choice i question!) what happens when i disown a white sock!

DAMMIT KENNY!

There was little doubt as to Williams’ overall game plan going into the current offseason. Along with improving the bullpen, a group which struggled mightily during the 2006 campaign, Williams was determined to receive young pitching talent in return for any of the surplus of veteran hurlers traded. He wanted to stay strong in the present and stay equally strong in the future.

so why would you trade brandon!?!?! he is young pitching talent! he’s good! he’s really really good! and you have an entire farm system ALREADY CHOCK FULL of people like sean tracey! maybe you should focus less on the team in three years and more on the team IN TWO MONTHS! ARRRRRRRGH!

McCarthy’s vacated fifth spot will be filled through an open Spring Training competition, which will include knuckleballer Charlie Haeger, Floyd, Danks, Masset and possibly even Lance Broadway. Sisco will start in long relief with the White Sox, with a chance to work on all of his pitches ultimately leading to a return to the rotation.

oh, well, so long as we have charlie freaking haeger throwing baseballs in the general direction of home plate we are good to go! i hope garland is looking forward to carrying the entire season the way i look forward to our middle of the division finish in 2007!

“I was just talking to [assistant general manager] Rick [Hahn] last night and looking at my board,” Williams said. “I could not have imagined that things would have worked out so well in my mind. I can’t imagine being more pleased then I am now.”

if you’re so happy about this situation maybe you should quit dropping ecstasy before engaging in trade talks! GOD!

so, left field is going to be dreck as scotty tries to remember how to catch balls again, and meanwhile we have a mental leadoff man; center field is going to be intermittantly switching between utter crap and middle of the road; jermaine in right field will be amazing as always but no matter how completely badass he is, one MVP can’t do all the outfielding by himself; then there’s first base where now paulie has no ross gload to fall back on if he has to step in as DH; crazy hijinks still at short where tad will have to do double-duty (speaking of dudes who can’t do all the work by themselves); joe crede at third, thank god!; and AJ chilling behind home plate; while we rotate through jon (steady and reliable), javy (gets unnerved and completely loses his stuff if he blows it to one batter), jose (great but injurable), mark (kidnapped by aliens shortly before last year’s all-star break), and THE MYSTERY GUY WE WILL PICK OUT OF A LINEUP AT SPRING TRAINING.

AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!